I’m a Sleep Moaner

Two years ago, I woke up in my dorm to find my roommate, and several of his friends, hovering over my bed. Each of them had huge, suspicious grins on their faces. Naturally, I thought they had sharpied a dingdong on my face. It turns out, they were actually laughing at the strange noises I…

The Early Bird Gets the Worm

They say that the early bird gets the worm.  I don’t know who they are, but in my opinion, they should mind their own damn business. Did the birds start this rumor? If so, I hope they get the bird flu. It’s a stupid idiom, and I absolutely despise it. Simply put, I disagree with the core message….