Greeted With Doors Wide Open

The world is rife with disasters. We’ve got economic turmoil, fuel shortages, poverty, homelessness, and even Adam Lambert. Every time I see a commercial on TV about a poor, struggling child in desperate need of food, I feel obligated to do something—like change the channel.

Just kidding. Unfortunately, there’s not much my broke, lazy butt can do. However, after some research, I was able to come up with one easy solution that promises to make the world a better place. The solution doesn’t make much sense, but hey, it promises to open some doors.

So what is it? Oh, I already told you—opening doors for people. It’s remarkable how such a mundane and effortless act can spark joy in others. Don’t get me wrong; it’s a nice gesture, but in most cases, it hardly warrants a “thank you.” All you have to do is not move your arm as you continue to walk in the same direction.

You don’t even have to wait for the person to fully pass through. Once they’ve made it halfway, you can release the door. Yet, despite this minimal effort, you’ll still be showered with gratitude—even if you inadvertently slam the door in their face.

It’s an awful lot of hype for something inefficient. Someone who holds a door open might waste 5 seconds while the other person only gains two seconds. If we tally up the 3 seconds wasted and multiply it by the times people hold doors open, then divide by the average human lifespan, the result is a million-dollar loss for every person on Earth.

Trust me. I have a math degree.

Unfortunately, at my university, this simple act of courtesy has morphed into an unwritten rule. It’s become an obligation. Instead of appreciating the kindness behind holding a door, people now judge and criticize those who don’t.

Isn’t the essence of a gesture to go above and beyond? Otherwise, it’s not a gesture at all—it’s a sneaky litmus test for manners.

I try my best to do my part, but it doesn’t always go smoothly. There are times when I hold a door open for one person, only to find myself standing there for what feels like an eternity, playing doorman for an entire circus troupe.

The worst part about my dorm is that I have to walk through three different doors—one to get in the building, one after sliding my ID card, and one to enter my hall. Sometimes, the same person will hold all three doors for me. I’m never quite sure how to respond without making things awkward.

Should I thank the person three times in a row? It seems logical to me, but I always get laughed at. I fail to see what’s so humorous about “thank you,” “thank you again,” and “alright, now I owe you a kidney.”

Leave Comment

Dec 30 9:34 am

I remember that day; it was memorable. Though as for you. You've been raised pretty darn well as far as I see it.

Dec 30 9:31 am

Lol at your comment about Adam Lambert. I don't usually go out of my way to hold open the door for people unless I know they're right behind me or they are an elderly/handicapped/kid. But I dunno, I just think it's nice to say "thank you" to those that hold open doors for me, just because I'm nice like that 😛 Of course, that means I have the same expectations of people I hold open doors for. Maybe not a kidney, but how about $10? 😀

Dec 30 9:01 am

I know what you mean. I try and hold doors open for people but it is as if when they see me holding the door open, they slow down and walk as slow as possible. That's annoying! I find at school its the teachers that never say thank you. It's like i've just wasted half my day holding the door for you so yeah its understandable for you to ignor me. Ahhr, some people.

Anyway, I love your new layout. Te quotes in the header make me smile 😀


Dec 30 8:59 am

No, not really. I prefer to read. I would write if I could think of a story, but mostly I just think of an event and then I don't know where to go from there. I do roleplay quite often though, because there the storyline is written for me. 🙂

Dec 30 8:53 am

Hmm. I'm okay at the writing part, but I can never get a good storyline, so I sort of fail at that.

Dec 30 8:43 am

Maybe it wasn't a dream. Maybe her sister is secretly the Queen of Hearts and they fed her a memory potion or something. And then she accidentally walked right back into Wonderland after they had kicked her out.

Dec 30 8:40 am

I know right? We had awesome fun splashing and suches. Haha, in my opinion manners are going way too far… for a socially awkward person such as myself there are getting to be waayyy too many societal rules for me to follow, its starting to get quite exhausting lol.

Absolutely fracking awesome job on the new layout btw… I swear I almost drooled -hangs head in shame-

Dec 30 8:33 am

Yup yup 🙂 Your new layout is awesomeo. I don`t even hold doors for people 3/4 of the time )': Usually because I`m usually in my own world focusing on what I have to do. 😛 Though you have manners, which I might lack, yet others might not have. It`s all good 🙂
But for the starvation ad`s on tv… I`ve seen it once& that`s all I need to se :/.
Happy holidays& take care 🙂

Dec 30 8:29 am

I think you may have been onto something there! Lol. I guess pretty much everything we've been saying doesn't make sense. But then again, I don't understand where your invisible friend came in. And anyway, Alice in Wonderland was dissapointing- in the end, it'd all been a dream. Corny.

Dec 30 8:19 am

I don't think that makes much sense.

Dec 30 8:15 am

I would, but I can't see him.

Dec 30 8:14 am

I'm not sure if uglyness can physically cause blindness. Just mental illness, I guess.

Dec 30 8:10 am

I'm not sure. I guess they're connected- you wouldn't freeze to death if you were wearing a furry jacket or something. But you don't die if you're just naked.

Dec 30 8:02 am

True, and I really hate the cold. We'd have no concept of privacy, either. We'd have to hide behind a bush whenever we were getting chanhed or something.

Dec 30 7:39 am

Thanks for adding me, I like your site 🙂 I'll follow you as well.

Wow, you like to think, don't you? I only ever open doors for family or teachers I guess. It's always good to have the teachers on your side, especially when they have a habit of giving everyone a detention when you don't hand in your work on time. If you hold doors open for them, they tend to let you off.

I think the world has too many doors. If we didn't have any, there wouldn't be the problem of having to waste your time while you hold the door open for somebody. But then again, it would be pretty easy to be burgled in the middle of the night if you had no doors.

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