Greeted With Doors Wide Open

The world is rife with disasters. We’ve got economic turmoil, fuel shortages, poverty, homelessness, and even Adam Lambert. Every time I see a commercial on TV about a poor, struggling child in desperate need of food, I feel obligated to do something—like change the channel.

Just kidding. Unfortunately, there’s not much my broke, lazy butt can do. However, after some research, I was able to come up with one easy solution that promises to make the world a better place. The solution doesn’t make much sense, but hey, it promises to open some doors.

So what is it? Oh, I already told you—opening doors for people. It’s remarkable how such a mundane and effortless act can spark joy in others. Don’t get me wrong; it’s a nice gesture, but in most cases, it hardly warrants a “thank you.” All you have to do is not move your arm as you continue to walk in the same direction.

You don’t even have to wait for the person to fully pass through. Once they’ve made it halfway, you can release the door. Yet, despite this minimal effort, you’ll still be showered with gratitude—even if you inadvertently slam the door in their face.

It’s an awful lot of hype for something inefficient. Someone who holds a door open might waste 5 seconds while the other person only gains two seconds. If we tally up the 3 seconds wasted and multiply it by the times people hold doors open, then divide by the average human lifespan, the result is a million-dollar loss for every person on Earth.

Trust me. I have a math degree.

Unfortunately, at my university, this simple act of courtesy has morphed into an unwritten rule. It’s become an obligation. Instead of appreciating the kindness behind holding a door, people now judge and criticize those who don’t.

Isn’t the essence of a gesture to go above and beyond? Otherwise, it’s not a gesture at all—it’s a sneaky litmus test for manners.

I try my best to do my part, but it doesn’t always go smoothly. There are times when I hold a door open for one person, only to find myself standing there for what feels like an eternity, playing doorman for an entire circus troupe.

The worst part about my dorm is that I have to walk through three different doors—one to get in the building, one after sliding my ID card, and one to enter my hall. Sometimes, the same person will hold all three doors for me. I’m never quite sure how to respond without making things awkward.

Should I thank the person three times in a row? It seems logical to me, but I always get laughed at. I fail to see what’s so humorous about “thank you,” “thank you again,” and “alright, now I owe you a kidney.”

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Dec 31 11:37 pm

From the future! The physics of the time zone confuses me sometimes. LOL, a lot is going on tomorrow morning. I doubt I`ll be awake to even watch my friends at the rose bowl parade :(.

Dec 31 10:44 pm

Ahaha, one woman band ;). Gotta do everything you want when the age is golden ;D! or is it ripe… I`m not sure :/.
Happy New Years to you 🙂
Around 2 hours+15 minutes go. :O! for me ;P.

Dec 31 9:31 pm

hahahaha! i almost forgot how great your blogs are. mind if i add you on my blog roll? 😀 the kidney joke is priceless.

that doesn't happen at my college. i may mumble a thankyou sometimes but most times i don't say anything, its just kind of expected but i don't get pissy if it doesn't happen. it is supposed to be a nice thing and i agree that saying thankyou tons of times (b/c i like you have to walk through a couple doors to get to my dorm) becomes robotic with no emotion anyway so the effect is lost. now someone holding an elevator always deserves a thankyou buuuut a door – naw, i can just open it myself if it's that deep 🙂

Dec 31 8:05 pm

HOLY CRAP! This place looks amazing! 😯

Goodness, I know what you mean! I mean, for me, holding open doors is like a reflex or something. I do it without thinking about it. As you said, I just hold my harm an extra few seconds when I walk through a doorway. Personally, I couldn't care less if they said thank you or not, but apparently everyone else does. :|

Just like when I sneeze, and someone says "God bless you." I HATE that expression, and I never say thank you to it because well, I AM NOT THANKFUL, I AM QUITE IRKED BY IT. But then everyone in the room has to stare like, 'ohno U din't gurl! U SO RUDE! Din't yo mama teach you no mannerz?!"

Haha, if the same person kept opening the door for me, come the the third door, I'd race them to it like, "I DON'T THINK SO! I'M OPENING THIS ONE, BITCH!" XD

Dec 31 5:53 pm

-kills your anti-spam thing-

Anyways, no I haven't abandoned the website. I'm going to turn it into something else, I'm not sure, but I have ideas for it.

It was just time for me to move to being my own host and everything, you are awesome though. Still is, but if I can't figure out anything for shockhorror, I'll let you know so you can put it up for whatever you want to put it up for. Lol.

Now give me twenty.

Dec 31 1:17 pm

That is hilarious. I completely agree I always feel awkward thanking someone three times for holding multiple doors open for me. It is just repetitive. I always end up thanking them each time. A couple times I'll stop or change my pace so I can just open my own damn door. Haha.

Great new layout, by the way! Holy crap you have a lot of traffic, too.

Dec 31 1:03 pm

Lol, I tried to post that comment 10+ times. Like everytime I clicked submit it told me to go back and enter the anti-spam code then finally I switched browsers and it worked.

Haha, yes more where that came from. The message is actually longer with a different ending..I may post it next blog, someone asked me to. I remember when I use to go OOOOOH in elementary whenever something happened.

Dec 31 1:01 pm

Ah I see you haven't changed much, lol. Love the rant and new layout.
I don't even know if I'll have a website anymore in a few days, I think I might have to purchase a new one :/

Dec 31 12:56 pm

Thanks for your comment. I can talk quite a bit about all sorts of things. xD I hadn't realised I had many male readers LOL. I'll be sure not to write a blog related so much to something rather feminine next time, haha.

On the subject of opening doors, you are right. I mean it's nice to get a thank you, but all in all it's basic manners. You know, being civil.

The point of a nice gesture is being nice. If you are holding open a door presumably you are doing it out of the kindess of your heart (hah) and not to get a thank you. You know, waste a few seconds of your day and get nothing in return… whatever. It's a natural thing, like you said, to hold open a door for someone. It's what people do.

Your college is strange. 😛 Aha. Got too used to people holding open doors, and they want something back. xD
Weird to judge people because they walked through a door that someone was holding open without saying thank you, if it's mere politeness.

You know?

I hate holding the door open for one person only to have another 9853958235932858 walk through it anyway -.-

I guess it's right to say thank you each time because how do you know they're gonna hold open all three doors?

Dec 31 12:43 pm

I love this site!

Your blog entry was quite hilarious.
I do think it's a nice gesture to hold the door open for someone. But as you mentioned, it is definitely not mandatory. It comes naturally to me if someone is behind me, to hold the door. But, if someone doesn't do it for me, I won't get mad. Whatever. Hell, it's just a door. <b>I can</b> open it with my own damn hands! LOL

Dec 31 10:56 am

reall nice layout !!
i think holding doors for people is important. but i agree, you shouldn't EXPECT a 'thank you' in return, because what you're doing is supposed to be nice. a 'thank you' is just a bonus. but once i held the door for this man and he was all like 'thank you ! god bless you!' and that really made my day 🙂 opening doors is the least you can do for people 🙂

Dec 31 10:31 am

Oh my gosh Justin your new layout is AMAZING!!! It's so unique!! I looovvee your site!! =)

LOL… and I dunno; personally, I find it to be very thoughtful when people open doors for me. Admittedly, I do get a little giddy. x)

Oh. And your response to that guy upon opening all 3 doors for you seriously cracked me up….. rofl.

Dec 31 9:02 am

Yeah, I tweeted about your blog. I thought I might as well say something. So rude of me to just stay behind the blinds. 😛

Aw, thank you! I just feel weirder in front of the lens. That lens is so judgmental, ya know?

Dec 31 8:55 am

I just woke up a bit ago from the nightly sleep. 🙂 There isn`t much to do today during the day, since I haven`t planned anything yet.

Dec 31 8:37 am

I personally feel good about holding doors open for people… I don't feel like it's an obligation. 😛 I guess some people just need the verbal "thank you" to boost their self esteem…? 😛

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