A Grimm Reminder: Tales from the Crib
I often stumble upon news articles lamenting that children witness too much violence on TV. I’m not here to argue whether that’s true or not, but I do think the authors of those articles are hypocrites. I mean, children have always been exposed to traumatizing amounts of violence. Why start caring now?
Exhibit A:
“Rock-a-bye baby, on the treetop,
When the wind blows, the cradle will rock,
When the bough breaks, the cradle will fall,
And down will come baby, cradle and all.”
What kind of sicko dreams up putting a baby in a tree and letting the wind play havoc? Surprisingly, this literal death threat has been around since 1765, and yet parents happily serenade their little ones with it, wearing grins like it’s all sunshine and rainbows.
I mean, close your eyes and actually envision what this nursery rhyme is saying. I imagine Jigsaw from the Saw movies rubbing his hands in glee, waiting for the cradle’s bough to snap. And in the background, Rob Zombie is belting out “Let the Babies Hit the Floor.”
What the hell did the baby ever do, anyway? It’s not like he deserved this horrible treatment. What crimes can a person commit at five months? Pooping in a diaper isn’t frowned upon until you’re at least thirty.
And did you know “Rock-A-Bye Baby” is touted as one of the first poems ever written on American soil? Well, sheesh. That was quite the promising start for the country.
But let’s get back to the point. Long before TV shows and video games were scarring children, we had Mother Goose, or as I like to call her, Murderer Goose.
Murderer Goose is also the mastermind behind classics like “Jack and Jill.” You know, the one where Jack severely injures his head and Jill spasms uncontrollably while plummeting to her death.
And then there’s “Humpty Dumpty.” The main character, the hero, takes a tumble off a wall, and bam! His innards go splat all over the King’s men. No little kid should be subjected to this. It’s cruel, and besides, the pain sounds egg-cruciating.
We’ve been force-feeding our children a diet of violence since birth. Maybe we should slap a legal disclaimer on these tales, just for laughs. How about: “Hansel and Gretel: Rated C for Cannibalism.”
All jokes aside, violence has been part of children’s lives for quite some time now. Television, ironically, might be the only opportunity for kids to see any happiness at all.
117 Comments
Nancy
The only one I know of is like 50 miles away :(! The only close food places is like. king taco, burger king, carl`s jr, mc donalds, subway, kfc, panda express, dunkin` donuts, &uhh. idks what else. D: it`s like fast food city here in LA -___-. &Them Dodger dogs up in the mountains 😀
Nancy
Haha, nah ;P. I`m a pro forum-fil-a :). I just came up with the fil a part because of some picture I saw earlier with a chick-fil-a`s chef hat thingr.
Cool :D! I`ll sign up. :] Thanks
Car
Nah, don't. Knowing me, I probably didn't make it that clear.
Nancy
I don`t like milk :/. Maybe that`s why I`m short! Haha, I had this sub twice, once in 7th grade& once this year (10th)& some things never changed. Always picking on the asian chick.
Haha, do you mind if I join your forums? I`m looking for a forum to join -_________- for a while.
Car
Oh, it is. I then changed the saturation of the colours etc on Photoshop.
Nancy
I just ate a while ago. Cup noodles ): I remembered, the last time I constantly ate cereal for breakfast was 10 years ago when I was 4 or 5 :O! Now& days, I just eat small portions of food for breakfast.
I always considered tomatoes as vegetables, until I got lectured to the max by a sub. teacher :(.
Holly
Here in the UK its around -5 degrees at night. It's too cold!
xxx
Car
Bahahaha! You may be right there!
Nancy
Yup! Tomato flavored candy which is mainly sold to the elderly :). Ketchup& sugar… It made me remember of chili cheese fries. &mmm. I want some :). of the ccfries. Haha
Car
Thanks! I just painted it myself and played around with the colours on Photoshop hehe.
Wow, I never eeally 'read between the lines' when people sing nursery rhymes. I guess it's cuz when you're young you don't understand properly and when you're older you don't bother with them anyway. LOL at “Hansel and Gretel: Rated C for Cannibalism.”!
Holly
I will have to get my camera working so I can take some pics of my shoes to put on my site. The batteries probably gone in my camera. It's rubbish, you take one picture and it stops working!
No shes from England like me but her older sister moved to Australia a few years ago so she has an excuse to go on holiday there! I'd love to go with her someday. She text me the other day and said it was over 40 degrees centigrade so she must be very warm!
xxx
Nancy
I`m not a big fan of chocolate :/. Fruit flavoried candies are the best! 😀 Except for tomatoes :(.
Susanna
Haha ^-^
Really good thanks! Not done a lot to be honest, but I've been in a really happy mood since the New Year, for some unknown reason. I guess I'm one of the "New Year, Fresh Start" peeps 😛
And yourss?
xx
Nancy
I love all sorts of candies. Well, Those Sweet Factories jelly beans 🙂 the pink& orange ones ;D! mmm, I love skittles. Original, wild berries& the sour ones. Except that the wild berries made me sick a few times :(. I love starburst to the max! &sour patch melons :). &Jolly ranchers. I`m not sure what type are those candies. But you get the main idea 😛
Holly
Haha, well the price does matter to those who pay for them! I normally keep it a secret so people who have actually paid for it don't get angry with me, but because I know you didn't pay for yours either I don't feel so bad!
I just got some sparkly pumps with a little bow on the front. They actually look quite nice. I love cute shoes!
I just spent a lot of my Christmas break with my family so I didn't have much time spare to spend with my friends. Plus my friends were spending time with their own families and stuff. My best friend has been in an Australia for a month over Christmas with her sister. I can't wait to see her again 🙂 I'm sure we will have loads to catch up on!
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