The Early Bird gets the Worm
They say the early bird gets the worm. I don’t know who they are, but in my humble opinion, they should mind their own business. I mean, who started this stupid rumor? Was it the birds? Is this some sort of avian conspiracy? If so, I hope they all catch a case of the bird flu.
I call BS on this whole “early bird” theory. It implies that people who wake up early, or accomplish things first, will reap all the benefits. That’s ridiculous. It’s not advantageous to be the first one up in the morning. Just ask the worm.
That idiom is a buzzkill. It assumes that all birds have an equal chance of being up at the crack of dawn, when, in actuality, some birds face additional hardships. You know, like the poverty-stricken birds that can’t afford alarm clocks. They are stuck on bird-feed stamps. They live in cardboard nests.
And on the other end of the spectrum, you’ve got birds with an upper wing. Roosters are always up early. That’s kind of their thing.
And don’t get me started on night owls.
In all seriousness, not everyone is a morning person. Some people thrive at night. We shouldn’t have to follow any set schedule. We can accomplish greatness whenever we want.
I don’t want to live in a world where I can only be successful if I wake up at the butt-crack of dawn. I’m always late to everything, so my life would forever be a disaster. I’d probably end up with the shittiest job ever. I’d be working some super sketch third-shift job at a nuclear testing facility scrubbing poop off of radioactive toilets. So yes, it’d be a shitty job indeed.
And worst of all, I’d be a loser. I wouldn’t make a name for myself. No one would know my name. They’d call me Hell. They’d call me Stacey. That’s not my name. That’s not my name.
All because of a stupid expression about a stupid bird. Sigh. I guess I’ll get over it. It’s not worth the trouble. The early bird can keep his damn worm. I don’t want to eat a nasty ass invertebrate anyway. Call me crazy, but I believe that sleeping-in and having a mediocre existence sounds much better than chomping down on a squirmy, nasty bug.
Unless the worm is gummy.
122 Comments
Alexandra
I feel sorry for the birds that don't eat worms. Early penguin catches the krill just doesn't have the same ring to it.
Aimey
Eww alarm clocks! Waking up early stinks. 🙁
Sandra
I'm definitely not a morning person. I'm not really human before noon and I'm at my best somewhere between 10 PM and 3 AM. So screw that bird that's all goodie goodie and gets up early. I'll eat that for lunch once I finally get out of bed.
Liz
im back! xD lol
Gena
ha thats so funny.
Kitty
If you are a 'poor bird' who lives in a carsboard and can't afford an alarm clock, you should just open your cardboard window and allow those filthy birds that sing at 4 fucking am to wake you up. V_V
Cynthia
Pffft, don't get mad that the bird's better than you at waking up. 😛
Robmarie
LOL @ Bird Feed Stamps! "It's the first of the moooooooonth!" – Bone, Thugs-N-Harmony
If life's accomplishments were measured by how early one wakes up, I'd be a total failure. I mean, I wake up relatively early *now* — but left to my own devices, anything followed by an "AM" is simply killer!
Cari
Aha, I'm never early either, I wake up nice and late whenever I can, but of course, I get in a ton of trouble for it by the parents >_>
Erin
Well, if you're going to get technical on me …No, you're right though 🙂
Hmm, birds keep waking me up on my days off and weekends. Chirping outside my window for half an hour. Maybe there should be a whole day of procrastination once a week or something 😉
Alicia
LOL that poor bird, you're wishing him ill. *shakes finger*
meh, I am also a procrastinator. 😀 *high fives* I just can't be bothered with so many things in life. But I guess of you try your best and all those other cliches that aren't coming to my mind at the moment, you can be successful in life. (:
What are you talking about you don't eat worms? Nonsense.
Jane
I think that as long as you make the most of your time then you will be successful. Some people do night shifts, some people do day shifts and both can be equally successful.
Waldi
Yea, I bet you were, huh? ;]
Tehee.
Sarah
Haha yeah! Or I could just learn how to fly and fly up the mountain.. I don't think flying requires good knee movement 🙂
Had any sledding incidents recently? 😉
-Sarah
Alya
Lol haha!
I did not think about that. haha. I am pretty dum you know!!
Anyways, how is your week? Having a great time?
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